victory_road | [closed] February Catch All

For a while, Chip had hoped they could pretend to be normal here. That with their worse nature hidden, they could just play at being normal for a while. And maybe that had worked for a bit; they'd managed to make friends, and even the few times they had hurt people it...hadn't been the end of anything. They'd even helped some people, or they hoped they had. Grant was happy here, and they had all their partners...

But maybe it was too much to hope for.

Uncomfortably familiar thoughts started to creep up their back as soon as Sylvain had fallen asleep. Even if no one said anything to them Chip could feel the heavy weights on everyone's shoulders, the dark mood stifling them. They saw how Claude held himself at a distance, how Grant felt so lost, Dimitri closing up inside his grief. Felix's snappiness and refusal to move from Sylvain's bedside...it felt too familiar. They remembered their mother crying herself to sleep so many nights, how that man had gone from distant to scornful despite all their best efforts. Even here, stifled as they are...it's their fault. They're just a poison.

There's no way the rest didn't know. Grant especially, even if he would never say anything (too kind, too gentle to do what they really deserved) but realize the root of their misfortune. If Chip hadn't run off to get Dedue, would he still be here? Was that the moment their curse took root? Or was it even before that, when they first took Dimitri's hand? When they gave Sylvain those s'mores?

But no one said anything. Not even Felix, though Chip had hardly given him chance to do so--why were they still pretending? Why wouldn't they just--do something, break the fake image, just get it over with? The frustration and fear built and built, but Chip held it inside--until one morning the lid just wouldn't stay shut.

It's not that they seek out confrontation--they're desperate to stop it, but it's always inevitable. No matter how much they try to stay out of the way, someone always finds them.

And it always ends the same way.

At least, with Dimitri, he doesn't come to find Chip on purpose. Not this time.

It's his Schrodinger's Last Day. Dimitri frankly isn't certain when Sylvain will wake up, and if any of them will want to stay in Ecruteak for much longer when he finally does. They've been in the city for a good month; their stays in other towns have been far less. Perhaps the road will help bring a sense of normalcy to it, or the next town they go to will have a fresh start.

With that in mind, he's let his employers here at the inn know his difficulty, and they've kindly agreed to keep him on a case by case basis. Dimitri is rather grateful for it all, truth be told, and he wonders if he truly looks that bad for them to take such pity on him.

He'll gladly accept it, honestly. His pride isn't great enough to bristle against that, not with the tidal wave of emotions and exhaustion that has come over him this part of the month.

So he's tidying up this work week as though it were his last, going around with the owners' Gardevoir to make sure that everything is in order. That's how he stumbles upon Chip, rubbing at his eyes as if that can help his own exhaustion and depression just... go. He stops mid-step when he spots them, blinking.

"Oh, Chip..." Shoot. He really does have to look presentable, now. Guiltily, he reflects that they've all been in such a state lately... He hopes it hasn't affected them too bad. He had hoped to make this a nice stay for them, after the mess that was Goldenrod. "What are you doing about here?"

"Why d'you care?" comes out before they can even think about it, defensive and angry. They grip tight onto one of their sleeves, glaring at Dimitri as if daring him to challenge their right to walk down a hall. "Am I not allowed anymore?"

Oh - behind Dimitri, the Gardevoir frowns a little, as the very psychic Pokemon picks up on a higher turnout of mental trauma than is normal. Which is saying a lot, with this group.

Dimitri himself hardly notices. He just blinks, brain stalling for a moment at the unexpected anger. Chip has never acted like this before, not around him. Certainly they've heard stories of how they were upset at Sylvain, but...

...He must have done something wrong. He often is, Dimitri is sure of it. "You can do whatever you like, Chip," he says softly, depression smothering any sparks of anger before they really have a chance to catch. "I just wasn't expecting to see you in this part of the inn." He pauses, hear strangling itself in his chest.

"...Did something happen?"

For Chip, it's all just sparks to the kindling. Whatever Dimitri really means gets warped and twisted, turning into anything they just don't want to hear--even if they think it was inevitable.

"So you don't wanna see me anymore? You're gonna say it?"

A flinch - did he say that? No, he's positive he didn't. But he can't understand where it's coming from, in that case.

"No, of course not. Of course I want to see you, Chip, and Grant, and Lazzo."

"No you don't! You're just being nice because you like Dad, stop lying!"

Whatever protest Dimitri might have is unfortunately useless, as Chip has already turned to dash back off down the hall.

It's been over a week, and Felix has settled into a routine, of sorts. He wakes up early as usual, and the first thing he does is check on Sylvain and Inda, and then take a picture of himself with Sylvain for the pile. Then breakfast, sometimes with one or more of the others if they're awake, although he doesn't say much nowadays at the breakfast table; and then his morning training and exercise.

Today is no different, although this time when he checks on Sylvain and nothing has changed, his usual vaguely numb frustration is more of a sharp and simmering irritation. Not with Sylvain, but with this place, this fickle and faceless god who controls their fates. At least they never had any proof that the Goddess was actually doing anything. This is so much worse, and the helplessness Felix feels bubbles up into impotent fury. It drives him to scream his rage into a pillow and curse the angry tears that pool at the corners of his eyes.

Once he calms down enough to function, he goes about the rest of his routine, burying the feelings as best he can. Once he gets outside and starts practicing sword forms, he'll feel better, he tells himself. He just has to get some food into him first, otherwise the others will harass him over it, and he's so sick of all their poking and prodding and forcing him to do things he doesn't feel like doing.

So when he leaves the room to go find breakfast, he's stony-faced and tense, and barely even notices when he runs across Chip until they're directly in front of him.

"Oh." He gives the kid a half-hearted nod of greeting.

Chip freezes up slightly when Felix nearly runs into them, but his half-hearted and distracted greeting only earns a glare and half-mumbled response as they move past him.

"Can't protect nothing..."

Felix blinks and abruptly stops walking, turning back to glare at Chip. ...the kid couldn't possibly know what's been going through his head this morning, right? There's no way they could. So what the hell are they talking about?

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me!"

They snap around to face Felix with an expression of furious contempt, fists balling up at their sides.

"Can't even stop people being hurt when the thing's right in front of you!"

"What the fuck is your problem?"

Felix has no idea why he's even bothering to engage with this...except that if Chip heard something from someone else, if someone's said something to them along these lines, then...well, it must have been one of only a few people. People whose opinions he, unfortunately, has come to give a shit about.

"Your stupid face!"

Chip punctuates that with a swift kick to Felix's shin and bolts away--probably before he can notice them tearing up.

Between spending most of his life learning to treat every interaction as a lesson in appeasement, and then working retail for years on top of that, Grant likes to think that he’s pretty well-adapted to the agonies of customer service. Of course, some days are still worse than others - and he doesn’t know if there’s something in the water today or what, but today has been… especially bad. He suspects his final shift at the Ecruteak PokeMart might have been the worst of his life, and he’s not sure how much of that was influenced by the absolutely shit mood he was already in when he woke up.

When it ends, he’s sorely tempted to just call it a day for responsibilities, lie down and maybe read something and call that the end of it. But he’s not the only person he’s responsible for, and while he can put Chip’s lessons on hold for a day, he’s still got to be ready in case they need anything else, and…

He’s already mulling over all that when he gets back to their room, dropping his coat unceremoniously on a chair and doing his best to keep the edge out of his voice. It’s not like he’s mad at Chip, after all. “Hey.”

Chip has curled themself up on the floor in front of the bed, Lazzo and Espie asleep on the bed itself while Patty has curled herself up fully around them--nearly enough to hold them there, actually. Chip themself looks completely miserable, visibly on the edge of a tantrum of some variety, and they cast Grant a wary, unsure look.

"...what?"

Oh. Well. Grant hesitates for a moment; he'd like to figure out what's up and see if he can comfort them, but... if he's honest, he's not sure he has that in him right now? Which is just... an absolutely shit feeling, frankly. He hates the idea of being too wound up, too tired, to help his own kid.

But, for now, he might have to settle for just... seeing what he can say. He shrugs, pausing to scoop Sooty up before he goes to sit down on the bed. "Nothing, just saying hi since I'm home. Something up?"

[closed] February Catch All

ANGY

no talk they angy

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angy....

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angy!!!!

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